Got Spit?

Please Watch Your Step When Exiting The Dugout

Baseball has got to be one of the most sentimental and romantic American sports. The Boys of Summer. The Boys of October. Dodgers, Giants, Yankees, Tigers, Indians, Cardinals..... There aren't many American men who can't relate to a baseball team. Come to find out there are a whole lot of women who love their Royals, Mets, Cubs, Sox, and so on.

That said, even as a guy, baseball can be hard to watch. It seems like after about 15 minutes I want to get up, grab the windex, and give the screen a good wash. It is a constant parade of spitting, chewing, and blowing-out nostrils. Tobacco chew, gum, and sunflower seeds. Not something you would ever want to experience on smellivision, if it existed. I'm not sure which would be a more difficult task: Cleaning off the sidewalks on Division Street in Chicago on a Sunday morning or cleaning out the floor of a dugout after a game.

And then there's the nail-biting-- theirs and mine. Getting through the last inning of a close game with the tying run on second base is a manicurist's nightmare. I mean, how long does it take to set-up and throw the damn pitch already? Last night in Tigers game 3 it became almost too much. Who needs hot dogs and beer? I need a beta blocker.

At least we don't have to wait through commercial timeouts. Unfortunately, I'm thinking replay review and manager challenges are not more than a winter away. But that's not all bad. At least it will give us time to clean our TV screens.

Go Tigers!