Such a Gift

A few days ago I saw a mother with her 40 year old son. He has severe mental impairment from birth. Nonverbal and physical deformities as well. His mother, a single woman in her late 50's or early 60's, is a saint-- an angel-- for the care and concern she provides her adult son. One week later another couple is in my office, they in their 60's, their daughter in her 30's. Again, the daughter severely impaired, non-verbal with physical and mental involvement. Again, the parents involved and fully attentive to the adult daughter who appeared obviously well cared for. Another day a mom is in with her toddler child. A healthy child, bright active and alert-- dirty, poor grooming, clothes disheveled. Fully disrespected if not disregarded.

My mother used to always tell us kids that we didn't realize what a gift it is to have good health and a good mind. She'd say it and I'd be annoyed as hell: just a guilt trip to stop me from watching TV when I should be outside playing or inside studying. Once again it turns out Mom was right. My mother would make sure our clothes were clean and we were well groomed and appropriately dressed before we headed off anywhere (other than the backyard to play in the dirt). I think Mom recognized she had a responsibility to raise good citizens and prepare us to step into a life of significance.  Neglect is just not a strong enough word for failing to recognize and cherish the gift of a healthy child. Neglect is just not a strong enough word for failing to uphold your responsibility to nurture and raise a child.

I have never seen this responsibility more clearly demonstrated than in the examples above; in the obvious commitment of parents to the care and keeping of children who will never be able to do so for themselves-- and in the obvious neglect of a child with the potential to lead the world. A healthy child is a immeasurably precious gift. To neglect that gift, a crime.