F-You Fondue

A few weeks ago I mentioned how my mind had turned to fondue. Not literally. My mind was firm as ever. I had just lay awake thinking about fondue.

Today I'm here to tell you I've now made fondue on two occasions and will never again. Fondue is not the dish you set out on the bear-skin rug in front of the fireplace with that sizzling hot swedish babe-- unless she's made it.  Fondue is not the dish you serve the in-laws first time over for dinner-- unless they brought the appetizer. Fondue is not for the cook who thinks he knows better than the recipes, better than the cookbook, better than the advice of the wife.

I'll make this short:  If you are set in your mind to make fondue, read and follow the recipe with precision and full attention to detail. If not, set aside 30 to 40 minutes for cleanup. Made improperly the stuff becomes a polymer capable of bonding re-entry tiles on a space shuttle. If it's fondue for you then I have just three words: The Melting Pot.