I Want, I Want

On Good Morning America they showcased a website where one can post their gift wishes for the holiday gift season. It's like a bridal registry for holiday giving (I'm refusing to use that word "gifting".) GMA reports it's gaining popularity and people say it performs a service. Yes, a service: They report it facilitates people getting what they want and giving what is desired.

Okay. I get part of that. But not much. I understand the frustration of not knowing what to get someone. But a website? Bridal registry, yes. It's good to be able to help equip a new home, providing a needed spring-form pan as opposed to a Jello ring mold; or a serving piece that actually matches a set. Not so with holiday gifts.

Kels can be evasive but she's usually straight forward. She talks when questioned. Evan is pretty smart and focused on what he wants for Christmas. He talks, we listen. Easy. But he's not capable of going on line and registering his wishes. No, an adult would have to use that service.

Before you file my profile under "Grinch" hear me out: I firmly believe in gift giving...as long as it involves children or other people with whom you actually share deep care and connection.  Your Mother's Aunt Martha in Connecticut? No. Your adult siblings? Maybe. Your spouse. Definitely. Your kids, at any age, definitely. But the fun in it, at least in my opinion, lies in the hunt for that great idea. That one thing or things you've noticed that would make a great gift. It does require some degree of attention on the part of the giver and, most importantly, connection to the recipient. And if you just don't know for the grand kids, nieces or nephews? Call someone who does. A gift registry for holiday giving is about getting you to buy more stuff-- more meaningless, unneeded, soon abandoned, landfill stuffing junk. It is not about finding deeper meaning in this season of giving.

Like great sex, gift giving should involve someone you really care about, be spontaneous, and often best unscripted. And, hopefully, it will also answer the question 'was it good for you?' in the affirmative.