Sunglasses

Friday I picked up a new pair of sunglasses.  Good ones are expensive.  And it's deceptive:  One always sees celebrities with the latest uber-cool shades in place but never see the price tag which reads, "Free."

I should be so lucky. Perks for doctors are vanishing faster than testicles in ice water.  I don't think I've seen a drug company pen or pad of paper in over a year.  Not that they were any good.  It wasn't like Hollywood perks:  The pens I received were about as far removed from a Mont Blanc as Jimmy Carter is from Paul Ryan.  There were some fun ones, though, like the Cialis pen that opened by slowly rising from its folded up position to fully erect and useable.  Clever.  Fun as it was it never prompted me to prescribe Cialis to anyone. (Wise, given my specialty is orthopedic surgery.)

I have always subscribed to the notion that a good pair of sunglasses are worth the expense.  I still do.  Unfortunately those name brand sunglasses now require even more expensive multifocal (read: bifocal) lenses.  Worse still, (vanity thy name is Mickey!) I want the tell-tale bifocal line eliminated and thus opt for the progressive lenses.

Like the new 10 speed bike I received when only in the 6th grade, I have promised I will take care of these babies.  I will not stuff them unprotected into a shirt or pants pocket, like I have been known to do.  I will not "clean" the lenses by wiping them with my shirt, or a paper towel, or Kleenex, as I've been known to do.  No, at a price somewhere north of $400, I will keep them in their case AT ALL TIMES.  I will wash them with an APPROVED SOLUTION and dry them with SPECIAL CLOTH.  And so far I have been diligent in my guardianship of these new sunglasses.  For all three days I've had them.